Depression really sucks

I am officially off the Effexor and it has not been easy.  I am experiencing what are called “brain zaps.”  It is really like your brain goes “bzzz zzzz zzz.”  It is very annoying and makes me want to scream.  My body is sore.  The commercials that say “depression hurts” are the truth.  It doesn’t help right now that I am on Levaquin that causes joint and muscle pain.  It’s a double whammy. Continue reading

Saying goodbye is hard

I was enjoying a BBQ with friends yesterday afternoon when I randomly checked Facebook. I scrolled through and saw posts saying “breathe easy Jennie.” I had to go back and check who it was posted for because surely it couldn’t be one of my best CF friends.  I immediately got up and walked away from our group of friends.  I don’t even know how to process the news of her passing. I quickly messaged mutual friends to find out what happened. We have been friends for about 15 years!! Her passing was unexpected, therefore it is a complete shock. We had plans for her to come here next month to visit when another one of my best CF friends (one of our mutual friends) would be here.  We were ready for a fun time with lots of laughing. Now myself and my other friend will be making plans to lay our great friend to rest instead. 

Jennie and I had many conversations about this day in our morbid way that we did. I am not ready for this day to be real. I am sad to the core.  Jennie was a wife, mother and a Meme (grandma).  Her family will be lost without her.  My heart hurts for them as they embark on this journey of saying goodbye and until we see you again.

Continue reading