2017 was a rough year. It had its ups and downs. In January I had transplant clinic which was good. I’m holding steady according to them. I see them, at Barnes Jewish in St. Louis, once a year to check me out. January also brought the 1st anniversary of my moms passing which was hard. I still miss her every day. The hole her death put in my heart will never be filled. I was on IVs in February, April, May, July, August which lead to being in the hospital because of my creatinine (kidney level) being elevated again. I had my gallbladder removed in September and did a week of IVs after surgery as a precaution. More IVs in November and then this whole virus/bronchitis/CF exacerbation or whatever it is in December that put me in the hospital for a few days. Man that’s a lot of IVs!
On another note this year has been rough with my depression. It was a rough roller coaster. Hopefully we have things figured out med wise so that I can better handle my depression. I do see a counselor whom I love. The subject of depression can’t taboo like it is. It is a real thing and it doesn’t mean you are weak. If anything thing it means you are strong because you are fighting through. I have to remind myself of that every day because I sure don’t feel strong when it comes to dealing with depression.
Now my feelings on this sickness that I have going on right now. I feel like it is never going to go away. My body hurts. It hurts to cough. I’m so short of breath. I have been spending my days laying in bed with my oxygen on trying to rest and get better. Which I feel like it’s not working…hahaha. I have 7 days days of IVs left. I really just want to feel better. I feel like I’m stuck.
Until next time….