Day 11 in homesick land

Day 11 brings nothing but more homesickness. It’s become a nightly and intermittent daytime activity for me to cry at some point depending not the situation or even one single word that is said.  It is so hard to miss those you love when they are only 20-25 minutes down the road. I looked out my hospital window this evening watching the cars driving on the highway when I began to tear up, as seems to be par for the course lately. I immediately picked up my phone and FaceTimed the love of my life and my rock and began sobbing and attempting to tell him how much I missed him, our son, the furry boys, home in general.  I told him as I have multiple times how sad I was, that I didn’t know if I could do it anymore, as in how much longer I can stay here in lock up and not break down even more than I already have.

Let’s take a look back since the beginning of December.  I was admitted December 3rd and was inpatient until December 11th for a total of 9 days. (See how bad this is…I am going back through my calendar to verify dates and came across the day I had to pick up my mom’s oxygen concentrator for her visit here at the beginning of January. Scroll past Shannon so you can make it through this post.) Moved clinic up to January 18th, started IVs to get me through the time I was in KC for my beautiful mothers passing and send off. I knew I needed to be in the hospital but that was not happening with the situation that was before me.  I was on 10 days of IVs before being seen and admitted when I returned home to TN.  I returned back to TN on January 26th and was admitted on the 28th. I was inpatient from January 28th until February 12th (Happy birthday to me in lock up!!!) for a total of 16 days. Released home to finish the round of IVs at home for 6 days, from February 13 through February 18. I had a whopping 7 days of IV freedom and a whopping 13 days between hospital discharge to admission. So if that shows you anything, shows you that I have been home/out of the hospital for 36 days from December 1-March 6. That’s not to include the days of IVs in between those days.  All of those dates are running together right now.  The bottom line is….I AM READY TO BE HOME WITH MY FAMILY!!!  Trust me I know I have more waterworks in there but I wouldn’t mind for them to come out for good reasons, happy tears ya know.

My husband made my night last night. He was at a friends house having a guys night watching the UFC fights. I texted my husband as I do anytime he is out without me telling him to be safe and let me know when he made it home safe.  Next text message I sent was “or you can always make a detour here and stay the night with me.”  Next thing I see, well an hour or two later, I see a handsome man walk into my room and get snuggled up into bed with me. That made my night and I didn’t want him to leave in the morning. It gets very lonely not having your spouse with you. Those late nights when you can’t sleep are the doosies. Those nights are when I crying myself to sleep. Ok I think I have bored you enough with the transparency of my heart at the moment.  Let’s move on to something else.

HEALTH UPDATE: The pain (muscle/skeletal) in my right side had improved. It is still there but not nearly like it was and not needing narcotic pain meds to help.  The spasming pain on my left side is still there better and it helps when I push on the area when I’m coughing or breathing deep. I have declined Flexeril because it doesn’t seem to be doing anything so why take it.  Still maintaining on the 2 IV antibiotics just fine. They finally let me have my oh so loved ibuprofen back…ahhhhh! Imagine that, things are a bit more tolerable with it on board. I’m hoping if all goes as planned I can blow this Popsicle stand tomorrow. It I can’t until Tuesday then I might be asking for ambien around the clock to get me to the time that I can go home. Hahaha

Now that I have my GoFundMe account set up to make it easier for giving/donating online to the Shannonigans Lun Fund, my family can’t thank you all who have been able to donate enough. We get notifications whenever someone donated and just let me tell you, tears have been shred when reading the donations. I am in awe of people generosity and so thankful for it very much. You donations are going to help make out family unit flow better when transplant comes. It seems far away but then again it has crept up on us way faster than we had expected. Thank you for helping us to become prepared, as prepared as can be.  I will be writer a blog in the future about more of the process ahead.

Thank you to every single person who has shared my GoFundMe page on Facebook. Spreading the word is the only way to reach potential donors. Instead of just sharing the link using “share now.” Use the “write post” option when sharing so you can say a little something about me, who I am to you, what it would mean for your friends to donate to my GoFundMe campaign and that any amount helps!  There are so many campaigns out there that you need to set it apart from others. I know that I pass up GoFundMe reposts that have no description.  Thank you so much!!!  Ambien is kicking in….so if anything doesn’t make sense, blame it on the drugs. Haha

Until next time.

2 thoughts on “Day 11 in homesick land

  1. Hugs It is harder than normal this time as you have been sicker than your norm and with your mom’s passing the grief can be overwhelming. I encourage you to keep with some counseling it really does help. It helped me thru my time with being ill and my dad’s passing. hugs I hope you are sprung to go home and rest tomorrow. Thank you for telling us your story.

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