Depression really sucks

I am officially off the Effexor and it has not been easy.  I am experiencing what are called “brain zaps.”  It is really like your brain goes “bzzz zzzz zzz.”  It is very annoying and makes me want to scream.  My body is sore.  The commercials that say “depression hurts” are the truth.  It doesn’t help right now that I am on Levaquin that causes joint and muscle pain.  It’s a double whammy. Continue reading

Change on the horizon…hopefully good

I saw my psych doctor today to talk about my depression and anxiety.  My antidepressants aren’t helping anymore.  I’m on Effexor and have been for many years and it’s not working for me anymore.  We are going to wean me off the Effexor and starting Trintellix (a newer med).  It’s not going to be an easy time weaning off the Effexor because I have been on it so long.  I pray that it is an easy transition onto the new med.  I need a break through.  I deserve a win in this one. Continue reading

CF is not my friend today

We took a short road trip to Panama City, FL to see some good friends this past weekend. We were able to go to the beach on Saturday.  I realized my happy place, the beach, is hard for me to get to with all the walking.  I had to take breaks walking the boardwalk and then on the beach.  Once I got to our spot to sit I was ok just sitting and enjoying the sand and surf.  I went in the water and that wore me out as well.  Holding myself steady in the waves was hard and took my breath away.   With all that said the beach is still my happy place even though it is hard on me now.  I want to be able to travel and not have to worry about getting out of breath, coughing, breathing treatments, etc. Continue reading

Pre transplant check up

I have been on a bit of a whirlwind road trip. I started off my road trip visiting my friend that lives outside of Chicago for a few days. Next up was the drive to St. Louis for my transplant clinic check up. My check up was good. They drew 14 vials of blood, took a chest X-ray and I saw the doctor. I’m doing well, sounded good. I didn’t have to do lung functions because I was able to send my last ones I did at my clinic. I am scheduled to come back in 6 months.

The last bit of my road trip was heading east to Kansas City to see my family for a few days. I will then head back home on Monday. All in all it was a good check up and has been a good road trip, except for the boring driving part. Haha

Until next time…

Depression on a rainy day

Depression on a rainy day is no fun.  Depression itself is no fun to live with.  Depression on a holiday where we honor the men and women who paid the ultimate sacrifice for our country is not easy either.  Reading/hearing all the stories of the fallen heroes is hard when you are not having a good mental day.  I got teary eyed (as usual) as the XM radio’s “The Highway” played “Taps” to honor those killed in action.  This weekend has been hard one for me and I don’t really know why.   Continue reading

Clinic Update

It was a good clinic visit today.  It’s always good when they say that you look the best they have seen you look in awhile.  I don’t know if I can attribute that to the Symdeko or just feeling decent.  I’m not trying to sound like a doubting Debbie but I just haven’t had any major “ah ha moments” to convince me it is symdeko but I should stop that way of thinking.  It is obviously working for the better, especially since I haven’t had any of the side effects. Continue reading